i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
