She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize