Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
you win again, gameday.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Randomize