she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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