Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
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Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
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It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.