Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank