How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Randomize
