We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
