Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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