i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize