Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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