So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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