Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
It was confusing and full of hummus
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
