Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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