This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Randomize
