I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Randomize
