i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
