So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
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