; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize