If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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