Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
No subtext here. People are naked.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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