just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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