So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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