dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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