So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
