Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
