You can't special order awesome
handjob tips. give me some.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize