This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bit a glass in half.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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