Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
