Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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