You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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