I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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