While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
