That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
