you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
