Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
