Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize