And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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