He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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