I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
