I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
