Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
