The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
