Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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