Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
