I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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