Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
i need some magic done to my vagina
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
