Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
