didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize