YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize