nut hugger
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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