I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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